i heart december!

this has been one of the most memorable decembers evar! with an A! i’ve been all smiles =) [excluding work..because retail during the holidays makes you want to kill yourself]. as the year comes to a closing..i have to say…this has been the best month for me this year. had some great memories, spent time with some great people. and i received the absolute BEST christmas gifts evaaaaaaar. case in point:

i fell in love with this bag when i saw it in the catalog and was quite surprised to receive it. <3

my dash was on the verge of eternal death. i am officially a part of team blackberry!

you can never go wrong with kidrobot products

teehee

i so needed a new ipod. after my last one was stolen, i never had the time to replace it. argyle skin ftw.

what a great ending to a horrible year. gonna start 2009 with a bang in new york! it’ll be the first time that i will see snow and new york. excitement! i’m smiling right now! and using a whole lot of exclamation points!

 

in a daze

i am FINALLY done with this semester. it was torturous. whew. this past month has been nothing but wonderful, despite all of the stress. =) i haven’t been this happy in soooooooooo long.

lots of eating out this week. i’m accumulating a new and improved list for 2009. i can now check off the oceanaire! it was fucking INCREDIBLE. holy shit, the oysters were so freaking good. i’m a die hard oyster fan. we also had 2 bottles of this great reisling and two different types of lobster. dessert consisted of this cake with meringue drenched with alcohol. it was pretty potent haha. please excuse the cursing….but there’s simply no other way to describe how good the seafood was. =P

we saw anjelah johnson last night at improv comedy. eh. she wasn’t too funny. the only thing that was worthwhile would probably be the nail salon bit but even then, it’s pretty played out. BORING. jo koy > anjelah johnson by far. i want to see charlie murphy in january.

ahhhh, so many things to be excited about! the holidays, reuniting with friends, spending quality time with everyone, and 2009! i can’t wait to start the new year. it’s going to be so much better than 2008, i know it.

 

=)

i’m so stressed right now due to school but I AM SO HAPPYYYYYYYYY

 

drenched in wine

feeling a bit euphoric. it’s different. i like different.

and this is a badass interpretation of eric clapton’s wonderful tonight. totally different feel.

 

fast forward

fall out boy – champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends

weird how quickly things can change. i have to say…this month has been a crazy barrage of drama and surprisingly, i came to a rather instant realization on my behalf. honestly, i’m perfectly fine right now. in fact, life is not just handing me lemons…it’s throwing a crapload of lemons at me….i’m just not sure if i want to make lemonade just yet. just gotta keep moving forward and prepare for the new year. 2009 better be good or else i’m going to have to smack a ho. mu ha ha.

i’m so very grateful for my support system. i love you guys. forreal, not for fake. but seriously, i’m finally letting the balloon go. no regrets!

things i’m anticipating:

- thanksgiving! nom nom nom

- rachmaninoff piano concerto 11/29

- good company on the evening of 11/30

- howie! 11/31

- michelle and alvin’s visit

- personal enrichment day

- gingerbread house/gingerman making day

 

just another productive weekend

i am currently working on a research paper and listening to some pretty great music. plans for this weekend include:

- a 10 hour work day tomorrow, followed by some more school work

- early meeting sunday morning…followed by work…followed by a study session with jiji law. we made lei a shirt last night, since his nickname is ‘the law’ and his last name is ji….it was only appropriate to iron on ‘JIJI LAW’ onto his shirt. we’re mature.

also, i’ve been working on my new years resolution list. i’m still adding but so far i have:

1. learn how to cook

2. travel to 3 places i’ve never been

3. gain 10 lbs.

4. buy less black clothing

5. beta fish training w/kimmie..followed by a beta fish tournament

6. purchase a drink for a stranger

7. compliment at least one person every week

8. be happy =)

still a work in progress

kudos to a certain someone for this song. ‘love remains the same’ by gavin rossdale

I never thought that I
Had anymore to give
You’re pushing me so far
Here I am without you
Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
But love remains the same

 

back to the start

Tom Petty – Free Fallin’

i had the shittiest day yesterday. the evening before my exam, i was unable to study and fell asleep…only to be awakened by a horrible nightmare at 1:30am that left me unable to fall asleep again. i cried and cried, hoping to be so drained that i would just pass out…but it didn’t happen. i was in a TERRIBLE state while taking my 2nd major exam and FAILED. i was unable to comprehend any of the questions due to my heightened emotional condition. i have NEVER failed an exam. i cried my eyes out at school..and just left.

that’s when my day picked up. chau took me to sugar babies for some delicious cupcakes and coffee. aftewards, we went shopping at two different malls. had dinner with jeff at ruggles cafe and ended the night doing a paper (yay!). i’m still at chau and fahd’s place…and what really made me cry was this:

- i woke up to find a note from chau. it was so sweet. she even placed a blanket over me while i was asleep.

AND

- fahd taped a note onto the microwave for me that said, “JULIE, your breakfast awaits in here. Remove plastic wrap before heating…enjoy!” He made me bacon, sausage, and a sunny side up egg…with hot chocolate on the side. (he tricked me into eating healthy. turkey sausage and turkey bacon ftl. jk)

i’m not going to school today but i feel much better. i love my friends.

 

Irredeemable

i can take this. i’ve gone through it before, i can go through it again. i see how much effort and faith that i invest into people, only to be shot down. i cannot believe how much pain i’ve endured..the countless nights spent crying myself to sleep, the nightmares, my inability to study, the continuous aching pain in my heart. it’s not going to happen again. i refuse.

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless–it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable” – C.S. Lewis

next time, i won’t be so fucking wreckless with my heart

 

Ready for 2009

Pearl Jam – Better Man

Memories back when she was bold and strong
And waiting for the world to come along…
Swears she knew it, now she swears he’s gone

2008 has been very tumultuous. lots of internal conflict, new experiences, self-discovery, unmet goals…mixed with a lot of stress, work, and confusion. so tired! i’m ready for a new year. it seems promising. maybe…we’ll see.

i scoff at my previous entry for january 2008

 

great success!

for the past few months, i have been entirely flustered by debussy’s ballade. for some reason, this piece (as therapeutic as it sounds) was causing me so much anguish. i know what it’s supposed to sound like, yet my hands were simply not cooperating! [and for all of you who ask me why i continue to take piano lessons FOR A GRADE on top of nursing school...it's because i thought that music therapy would ease the stress] …well, i thought wrong. it is very unfortunate to not have enough time to practice because not practicing = you suck. anyhow, today of all days…i sat down after not having time to practice for a whole week..again.. and as Emeril would say, “BAM!” it all came together! after 2 agonizing months, i can now play the piece completely through. i’m not exactly sure what happened but i have finally rekindled my relationship with debussy. my world is at peace now.